Three Steps Toward Thankfulness
About this time of year, there’s a phrase that begins to creep its way back into our conversations. We see it on social media, and we hear it at church. We ask each other about it, especially in the month of November. It’s such a common phrase that we hardly even think about it anymore: “I’m thankful for . . . .”
But as I pondered this today, I began to wonder what it actually means to “be thankful.” Does it mean that we gush extensively about the sunset? Or that we use the infamous hashtag trio: #thankful #grateful #blessed? Does it include every age group? The saved as well as the unsaved?
I wanted to understand better, so I looked up the definition of “thankful.” The definitions I found were wide and varied, but basically, it involves three steps:
Awareness
Appreciation
Expression
First, awareness. Of course, this is an important part of the process! If we aren’t aware of things, we certainly can’t feel any emotions or make any choices about them. We spend much of our time inwardly focused on our own needs, wants, dreams, and thoughts. Actually, I think it’s in this first step toward thankfulness that many of us fail.
What exactly is the opposite of thankful? It’s not un-thankful, nor even discontent, although that is a symptom. It is selfish. When we are so busy going through life demanding that we get everything we want, focusing on how we can please ourselves, worrying about getting enough me time—then we can’t possibly be aware of all God’s blessings to us. Romans 1 shows us what happens to people and society when selfish hearts are indulged, and it’s not pretty. And the first step after salvation to overcoming those natural tendencies is to be aware of all that God has done for you.
Let’s do a little exercise, shall we? Stop reading and look around you. Go ahead. I’ll wait.
What did you see? For starters, you’re reading this blog on some type of electronic device that certainly was not cheap—a computer, laptop, tablet, or phone. And you have some type of connection to the internet—which also costs money—in order to access the website and this blog. In my case, I’m sitting in a comfortable recliner, with a plush white blanket across my shoulders. A beautiful leather notebook rests on the arm of the chair, with a bag of variously-colored pens nearby. My tea sits waiting on the end table for the slightest thirst to arise. A beautifully scented vanilla/pine candle is lit next to that. All around me, I see signs of luxury—at least to most of the world’s population: cushioned couches and chairs, painted walls, electricity, appliances, books galore, and food in abundance. Americans often claim to be poor, but we forget that much of the world would give almost anything to be as “poor” as we are.
Don’t forget to be aware of all the things you can’t see, as well. Obvious in the mind of any Christian is our salvation, paid for by the blood of Jesus. What a gift! How dare we go one day without considering the extent of His sacrifice on our behalf! But what else have you forgotten? The Holy Spirit’s indwelling presence, the eternal inheritance that is ours through Christ, the mystery of the gospel that allows us Gentiles to become the children of God. On and on we could go with spiritual blessings.
Beyond that, there are other invisible things to consider. Your education, the safety that allows you to sleep through the night without fear, the peace that pervades your home and relationships. The knowledge that you can go to the store and buy food for your family. Your health. God’s provision in daily matters.
Did you discover more than you expected? Me, too.
So now that we’ve gotten started on the awareness, the next step is appreciation. The girls in my husband’s family have a group chat. We talk on it almost every day, giving prayer requests and praises and generally sharing the things that are going on in our lives. Recently, one of the conversations struck me. One of the gals shared how overwhelmed she was with God’s goodness to her. She said, “Does it bring tears to your eyes when you realize [God’s love?]” And it made me stop and think. Do I truly appreciate those things that God has done for me? Do you? Or are you obsessed with what you don’t have? I think it’s human nature to always want more, to never be satisfied. And while it’s important to keep growing in the Lord, we lack quiet, satisfied hearts.
When was the last time you meditated on enjoying and appreciating what you have? We are so constantly on the go, in a hurry, busy-busy-busy that to sit for a morning and enjoy the company of a good book, savor the sweetness of a baby’s cuddles, or literally count our blessings is a foreign concept. In case you have gotten on the wrong track, allow me to gently remind you that busyness does not equal godliness.
And the last step is expression. The Psalms are full of examples of thankfulness and praise to God. Use these as your model! You’ll never run out of things to be grateful for. Go ahead and give a testimony at the praise service. Nothing is too small to be remembered. In fact, it is the will of God that we give thanks in everything. Sing a little louder on Sunday morning. When someone asks how you are doing, take that opportunity to express your thanks to her and to God for her. Use your voice to thank God for all He has done for you.
But expressions of gratitude don’t have to be limited to just words. We can also live thankfulness. Share with others the material blessings you have. Invite a friend over for tea and listen to her story. Invest some of your resources into the church nursery or library. Volunteer for a charity that shares your values. Let God’s goodness bring tears to your eyes—without pretending you have an eyelash. Don’t be ashamed to be overwhelmed with all God has done for you.
One of the hardest places to be thankful is in the ordinary, mundane things—like your workplace or your own home. Take special care this week to tell those nearest you why you are thankful for them. Is it your husband’s considerate care for you? His hard work to provide for you? His faithfulness to your vows? Is it your child’s first-time obedience? Her willing help with dinner? Your son’s goofy jokes that keep you smiling throughout the day? Let those loved ones know that you notice and that they are making a difference in your life.
Let’s get to work developing hearts of thankfulness to our Father, whose gifts are always good. May I encourage you to spend time becoming aware of all these things, then appreciating them, and finally expressing that gratefulness to God and others. You will find that you have more to be thankful for than you ever realized.