God Is Not a Man

“I will not execute the fierceness of mine anger, I will not return to destroy Ephraim: for I am God, and not man; the Holy One in the midst of thee: and I will not enter into the city.”

-Hosea 11:9

From a child we have been developing our beliefs about love, whether by things we hear or observe, through influences of others, our personal experiences, or what we are taught from the Bible. The devil works diligently to define “love” and exalt it above God’s Word through entertainment, consumerism, government, cultural trends, schools, and through social media. It is the enemy’s desire to confound the minds of believers by causing doubt and unbelief in a loving God. A biblical understanding of God’s love will help you reverence a holy God whose heart of love and demonstration of love far exceeds the world’s view of love.

Love is one of the most misunderstood attributes of God, because we tend to frame God’s love in a humanist manner. God’s love for us is perfect, whole, unconditional, righteous, unending, sacrificial, unfailing, and pure. Our sin nature has altered the way we express and receive love. Even if you were to argue that love is an emotion, it is still corrupted by sin. All aspects of our life are tainted by sin. Therefore, love that flows from a well-intentioned heart still is flawed, incomplete, self-centered, intermittent, conditional, and reciprocal.

When it comes to love, we might hold other people—husbands, parents, friends, children—to an unattainable expectation that only God is able to meet, while we have low expectations for God to satisfy our longing to be loved.

God is not man (Num. 23:19; 1 Sam. 15:29), and we cannot compare His perfect love to man’s imperfect love. His ways are higher than our ways (Is. 55:9). Submitting to the world’s view of love may lead to an accusation of God being unloving and indifferent.

I have counseled many women who struggle with the concept of love because of a hurtful past. Abuse, betrayal, rejection, and neglect can condition a person’s resolve to give and receive love. People tend to build walls and set boundaries that will not allow other’s compassion and love to infiltrate. Developing relational defense mechanisms becomes a way to handle past hurts and sufferings. A flawed perspective of God materializes out of experiences associated with a troubled past. God is blamed for the injustice and thought of as uncaring and unsympathetic.

The world justifies a reciprocal love, and it is a common snare that many Christian wives can easily fall into. Unfortunately, there have been some popular Christian books that promotes this counterfeit logic. It is contradictory to God’s Word, and it is not congruent with God’s nature. God’s love for us is unconditional and sacrificial—without thought of return. There are no exceptions or conditions to the admonition for wives “to love their husbands.” (Titus 2:4) The danger in believing that love is “give and take” is that it not only nullifies God’s commands, but promotes a faulty theology of God. Humanly speaking, we tend to believe that God operates according to our system of beliefs. Therefore, we only return the love that is given to us according to our perception. This humanistic view of love leads to dissatisfaction and discontentment. We also run the risk of harboring bitterness and resentment either towards our husbands and/or God.

Some believe that love is earned. You have to be accepted in order to be loved, or others need to meet your qualifications to be shown love. Again, there are   repercussions to this way of thinking. We will always fall short of living up to others expectations, leaving us with a false sense of unworthiness. Expecting others to prove themselves worthy of our compassion leads to loneliness. The belief that love is earned lends to an inaccurate perception of God. You will see Him as either unattainable or insufficient.

Allow the Words of God to define and exemplify love. We can avoid unhealthy and unbiblical expressions of love by allowing the Bible to interpret the Bible;

“The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.” (Jer. 31:3)

“The LORD is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and of great mercy.” (Ps. 145:8)

“It is of the LORD’S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.” (Lam. 3:22)

“But though he cause grief, yet will he have compassion according to the multitude of his mercies.” (Lam. 3:32)

“The LORD thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; he will save, he will rejoice over thee with joy; he will rest in his love, he will joy over thee with singing.” (Zeph. 3:11)

“But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Rom. 5:8)

“But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us.” (Eph. 2:4)

“Here is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.” (1 Jn. 4:10)

Let the Words of our Lord and Savior encourage you as you seek to think about and express love according to His standard, “Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another. No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us.” (1 Jn. 4:11) We can love others rightly and sufficiently because God first loved us. There is great hope in the charge that Jesus gave to His disciples after He washed their feet, “A new commandment I give unto you. That ye love one another, as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.” (Jn. 13:34) Jesus finishes His thought by saying that the love that you show to others will be a testimony for Him. Now if God has commanded it, then He has also equipped us with all that we need to carry it out.

God is not man, but rather the Creator of man. He is the originator of love in its purest form and unaffected by sin. It is His love that draws us into a personal relationship with Him, and it is His love that enables us to love others. Pray and ask God to give you a heart to love people the way that He loves them.